God has created us to be in relationship – with Him and with other people. Jesus has prayed that believers enjoy the unity of relationship that He, the Father and the Holy Spirit have enjoyed for all eternity. (John 17:20-21) Every relationship, including our relationship with God has three aspects.
1. The Basis of the Relationship, an event with lasting influence
Every relationship begins with some sort of defining shared event, or experience:
Family Relationships: We are born into a family
Marriage Relationship: We exchange vows at a wedding
Work Relationship: We are hired into a company
Church Family Relationship: We join a local church
Neighborhood Relationship: We move into a community
Friendship Relationship: We have a shared experience, (went to school together, roommates, played on a team together, part of a club together, traveled together etc etc)
And so it is with our relationship with God through Christ. The moment we trusted in Christ, we were born again, regenerated by the Holy Spirit, and placed into the Body of Christ. This is a one time, instantaneous, irreversible transaction completed by God. John 5:24; 1 Cor 1:30; Eph 2:1-9
This is the basis of our relationship with God, it is totally the work of God on our behalf – by Grace. We contribute nothing to our salvation, we are eternally secure in Christ.
2. The Experiential State of the Relationship
Every relationship at a given point in time has a certain state, or condition. The relationship may be open and healthy, where we want to be with the other person. OR The relationship may be strained, with unresolved conflict, where we are not even on speaking terms.
And so it is with our relationship with God through Christ. Just as with an earthly father, so it is with our Heavenly Father. Our relationship may be strong and healthy, OR we may have something that is hindering our relationship. The state of our relationship with God is expressed in the “Walk” passages in the Bible. The believer is either “Walking in the Light” in Fellowship with God, OR “Walking in Darkness” out of Fellowship with God. This distinction is conditioned on our obedience to the commands of God, and being cleansed from our sins through confession. 1 John 1:1-10 Our current state, good or bad, does not alter the secure basis of our relationship with God.
Jesus used the word “abide” in John 15 to describe the current state of our relationship. The believer is either abiding in Christ, or not. Central to our current state is the command to be filled with the Holy Spirit. Eph 5:15-21
3. The Maturity of our Relationship
The third aspect of our relationship describes how the relationship has grown over time. The maturity level describes the strength of the relationship, and how the relationship is expressed, including the expectations we have in the relationship. A father relates to his 5 year old son, his teen son, and his young adult son very differently.
And so it is with our relationship with God through Christ. As we grow spiritually, and become more like Christ, our relationship with God is expressed differently, and carries different expectations. A brand new believer relates to God very differently than a mature believer of many years. The failure to grow spiritually was the reason for the harsh rebuke in Heb 5:12.
Understanding these three aspects of our relationship with God provide a valuable framework as we seek to understand the Scriptures. For any given passage, the writer may be addressing the basis of our relationship, the experiential state of our relationship, or the maturity level of our relationship. Remembering these distinctions will help protect us from faulty interpretation and false teaching. To be effective Disciple Makers, we must come to understand the commands related to abiding in Christ, (our experiential state) and be able to properly assess our current spiritual condition.
There is more on this in DM Series 1, Section 3, and DM Series 3, Section 5.
May the Lord use each of us to be part of a Disciple Making Movement within our sphere of influence.